broken

"You need to take it easy. If you keep exerting yourself, you'll never get better. It's the reason people with hemorrhoids can't ever get rid of them... because they end up using their butts EVERY DAY."

-Joe

I have managed to hurt my back, neck, and shoulders pretty severely. It could be from sharing a queen sized bed with a toddler who is too big to be sleeping with us... yet, still not having the proper space for her to have her own bed. It could be from having to carry a 27 lb. toddler up and down the two flights of stairs in our apartment building every time we have to go anywhere. It could just be from having to carry a 27 lb. toddler much more than my body would like too. Regardless of the situation, I done screwed myself up pretty bad. Fully turning my head from side to side is something I have not been able to do in at least a week. Tilting from side to side also requires a ton of effort and pain. Bengay and Extra Strength Tylenol have become my new best friends. The discomfort of this nuissance has also caused nasty, daily headaches. In short, I am currently a physical mess.

Now, I am no stranger to back and neck problems. I once pinched a nerve in my neck by simply DOING MY TAXES. Typically these episodes go away with a couple days of rest, but resting when you have a Cheech in tow isn't exactly the easiest thing to accomplish. The biggest bummer of all is that I've had to stop exercising.

Hold the phone... did she just say "STOP" exercising?

Yes, I did. Those of you who have been reading this blog for a long time know that I am no fan of exercise. Well, that hasn't exactly been the case these past few months. After 32 years of being an anti-exercise advocate, I have finally come around. Like I've mentioned before, getting back to my pre-pregnancy size was, luckily, quite easy for me. Getting back to my pre-pregnancy shape, however, has been a whole different story. And I'm well aware it sounds a teensy bit ridiculous to hear some stupid mom complain about how badly she wishes she could have her "old" body back (I used to judge and roll my eyes, too), but trust me, it's hard to know what it's like unless you actually know what it's like.

So with our Mexico trip around the corner, I decided to start taking exercise seriously. The goal wasn't exactly to look like hot shit in my bathing suit (for the record, I've never looked like hot shit in my bathing suit), but to at the very least look like I care. I would pack Cheech up in her stroller and we'd go for three mile power walks. I did this every day for three months, and I started to see some amazing results. But the real surprise was that I found myself liking these hour-long strenuous walks (I know walking isn't usually strenuous, but try doing it while you're pushing a 27 lb. baby in a 17 lb. stroller with a 5 lb. bag carrying all of your baby crap). And not only was I liking exercise, I was even looking forward to it. I had turned a new leaf.

And then the whole family got sick, and shortly after my back started to give out. I have not been able to properly exercise for at least two weeks now and I have to admit, I'm kind of miserable about it. Who am I?! It's so weird, right? I woke up a couple days ago feeling somewhat better, so I decided I'd try and take Cheech for a hike. Big Mistake. I came back feeling like my body was seconds away from splitting in half. Needless to say, Joe was not pleased with my stupidity (hence his wise words above). All this means that I'm officially off exercise until I'm 100% back to normal. Never in a million years would I have imagined myself saying this, but this sucks. Big time sucks.


Joris Kuipers